Lessons we learn from ourselves.

Four kids, 8 and under, home all weekend, with a husband that works full time and is getting his master's degree. Two of those kids are three and under. Do you think we get out much? Hell to the no.

It's not that we don't want to. We used to go all out, lug all that ski gear up to the mountain every single weekend, head out camping for a night or two so far in the middle of nowhere, it might as well have been Alaska. But then came number four. And life as we knew it stopped.

In other words, all you dear, sweet, lovely, sincere friends of mine that said, once you have three, the fourth is like, nothing. Well, I'm just one big sucker, cuz YOU LIE!!!!! I bet as soon as I got pregnant you just snickered away behind my back, probably just wanted a little company for that misery. But I love you anyway. :)

See, we were doing okay with three. Everything was a hassle, but it was still doable. I didn't feel like we were TOTALLY killing ourselves. We were, but I didn't feel like it. We even had our 18 month on skis and things were looking good to go in say, about two more years. Then we go for even numbers. And we get ourselves a strapping young lad. Now, this part is great, and of course, we wouldn't change a thing. But boy, did number four change us.

Andrew sleeps. A ton. More than the others combined, I swear. Everyone says, "How on earth did you write a novel?" My response? "I can't leave the house because all my baby does is sleep." What else should I do? Zumba at home is out of the question. I'm too lazy.

Truth is, I just don't want the hassle anymore. I don't want to go to the grocery store with more than one child. I don't want to drive all over the valley every night taking my kids to activities (I used to do this. And I would still be doing it if I only had two. But four. Damn near impossible.) It's a good thing, really. Teaches my kids to make choices. Teaches me to make choices. Slows us down. God gives you what you need and apparently we needed to put on the brakes. Enjoy it all a little more.

So now I go for the hand out at home kind of days rather than the kill yourself fitting in ten activities kind. It's all good, except for one thing. The fighting!! Oh, the fighting. Over ridiculous stuff. I lose my head. I knew I had to get them out of the house at least once a day over the weekends (Sunday is easy because it's church), but I don't want the friggin hassle. I figure if we do anything, it's gotta be some big thing where everyone gets dressed and I have to take a shower (heaven forbid) and the baby can't be gone long and can I just say hassle, hassle, hassle. I'm over it.

But today. The kids were fighting and driving me bonkers. So I dug deep and decided we would go to a sled hill nice and close by. Just the five of us. And to my overwhelming surprise, my two oldest cooperated, helping me with the younger two, carrying their own sleds. That's right. I'm still blinking twice to make sure it wasn't a dream, but they did not ask me to carry their sled even once. In fact, my oldest was carrying the three year old's sled too, and sometimes with her in it. When the baby was crying, my oldest picked him up and carried him up the hill too. Shock. Utter shock. I'm telling you. Your kids can really throw you for a loop sometimes. The good kind. We had a really, really fun time. And I didn't feel like it was all that hard of work. Did I mention that this whole sledding thing is about 99% cheaper than downhill skiing?

Best part, and the lesson learned is this. When we got home, everyone snuggled together on the couch, SHARED (are you kidding me?) popcorn and water and snacks, and quietly watched a movie without a single cross word to one another.

The lesson? Nothing earth shattering or new. Just that if you work hard, the reward will come. It was worth the effort to go outside and take the crew sledding by myself, because first, it taught them to help one another and helping me. And secondly, it helped them to blow off some steam together, bringing them closer, helping them to enjoy the quieter activities when we get home.

Ahhhhhhhh. It might only last a couple of hours, but I'll take it.

I know, I know. It will all get easier. But right now, I'm in the trenches. So I say, forget Apres ski, chica, I'm cracking a cold one to Apres sled.